Hurt ...

Has anyone experienced hurt? You might think this is a silly question - but it's not. As humans, we experience all types of pain, and our bodies often take care of it. For example, how many times have you hit your toe, and the pain receptors in your body, after some time, will take care of that pain, and it will allow you to forget about it throughout the course of the day?

But what happens when you have so many emotions safeguarded, and all of a sudden you receive a call that a loved one has passed or a loss of someone loved, or the mere fact of having to make decisions that feel as if your heart is broken into pieces.

Many times we forget that emotional pain is a subjective experience of intense negative feelings, including grief, shame, loneliness, humiliation, fear, and dread, that affects how you perceive yourself and how you function day to day. It is not a metaphor or a sign of weakness. Brain imaging studies show that emotional pain activates many of the same neural pathways as a broken bone or a burn, making it as neurologically real as any physical injury. This is why many songs are heard over and over to help these emotions:

Psychological Mechanisms Behind Repeat Listening

Mechanism	Brain/Psychological Process	Example Effect on Listener
Dopaminergic anticipation	Reward circuitry fires before a musical peak, not just during it	Craving to hear the chorus or drop again
Mere exposure effect	Familiarity increases perceived liking over repeated exposure	A neutral song becomes a favorite after several plays
Emotional regulation	Music selection actively shapes or maintains mood state	A sad song reduces the intensity of sadness rather than worsening it
Nostalgia activation	Familiar songs reactivate autobiographical memory networks	Replaying a song "brings back" a specific time or person
Predictive processing	Brain rewards accurate expectation of musical structure	Comfort and calm from knowing exactly what's coming

Psychologically, replaying a song usually signals that you're using it as a tool for mood management, memory access, or a sense of control, or just closing a chapter in your life.

Many times, when we have a loss, and this relates to any losses, it's important to understand the importance of a moment of sadness, hurt, and even despair.

I use water therapy!

If you've ever found yourself crying in the shower, you're not alone. According to new research from Showers to You, 74% of people worldwide have shed tears in the shower. It turns out there's real psychological science behind it—and some surprising benefits too.

Experts say the shower is one of the few places we can truly be alone, making it a natural space for emotional release. Clinical psychologist Dr. Amber Johnston explains that the combination of warmth, solitude, and physical relaxation creates "an exponential effect," allowing the body to release tension and shift into a more relaxed state.

Many times, decision-making comes with pain because, honestly speaking, it just does! Counselor Georgina Sturmer adds that many people hold back their tears in public or even around loved ones due to societal conditioning. "We often don't feel comfortable crying, so the shower becomes a private space where we can reconnect with our emotions."

And the act of crying itself? That's good for you too. Dr. Johnston notes that tears help reduce cortisol, release feel-good endorphins, and stimulate the vagus nerve, which activates the body's calming response.

Both hot and cold showers have their perks. Warm water relaxes muscles, soothes pain, and triggers oxytocin, while cold water boosts energy, focus, and even resilience.

One thing we should never forget is that humans are born unable to survive alone. This can be debated (this is my personal opinion as well), but infants depend entirely on caregivers for years, far longer than most other species. Evolutionary researchers believe this prolonged vulnerability is why the social bonding system "piggybacked" onto the physical pain system over millions of years. By borrowing the pain signal, the brain created a powerful deterrent against social isolation. Getting separated from the group was a death sentence for early humans, so the body learned to treat social threats the same way it treats physical ones.

This wiring persists today. To the extent that rejection hurts, heartbreak hurts, words hurt, and you are motivated to avoid situations where rejection is likely. Over evolutionary history, people who felt the sting of exclusion most acutely were more likely to stay connected to their group, gaining access to shared resources, protection, and safety.

Emotional pain, in other words, is not a flaw in the system. It is the system working as designed, so whenever you feel hurt by any situation, don't hesitate to take a good, long shower. If you have a bathtub as I do, sit down, let the water run over your face and hair, let the tears roll down your face while listening to your favorite song, and understand that sadness is an emotion that also needs attention, and that crying is also beneficial to your health. Even Harvard agrees with me...

https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/is-crying-good-for-you-2021030122020

Health benefits of crying

As a phenomenon that is unique to humans, crying is a natural response to a range of emotions, from deep sadness and grief to extreme happiness and joy. But is crying good for your health? The answer appears to be yes. The medical benefits of crying have been known since the Classical era. Thinkers and physicians of ancient Greece and Rome posited that tears work like a purgative, draining off and purifying us. Today's psychological thought largely concurs, emphasizing crying as a mechanism for releasing stress and emotional pain.

Thank you for taking the time to read and share my thoughts!